my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize