You're my little dorito
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Randomize