apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Randomize
