please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
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