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At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Randomize