so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
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