I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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