some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Randomize
