He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
