Texts From Last Night

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  (970): View more from Colorado

  I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now

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  (970): I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now http://tfl.nu/72p0
  Replies (7) Good night (994) Bad night (1992)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it

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  (813): There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it http://tfl.nu/xcmh
  Replies (19) Good night (875) Bad night (3646)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund

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  (480): oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund http://tfl.nu/xo4q
  Replies (6) Good night (3007) Bad night (940)
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  (225): View more from Louisiana

  He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.

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  (225): He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that. http://tfl.nu/0p85
  Replies (28) Good night (1419) Bad night (4911)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.

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  (443): Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar. http://tfl.nu/j1fg
  Replies (12) Good night (4980) Bad night (1585)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase

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  (717): You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase http://tfl.nu/khjs
  Replies (3) Good night (1648) Bad night (754)
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  (587): View more from Alberta

  Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.

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  (587): Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch. http://tfl.nu/ad1t
  Replies (6) Good night (2387) Bad night (830)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face

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  (+44): Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face http://tfl.nu/5obj
  Replies (19) Good night (811) Bad night (1226)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.

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  (330): I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out. http://tfl.nu/zfn4
  Replies (2) Good night (1434) Bad night (550)
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.

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  (502): got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood. http://tfl.nu/bzvq
  Replies (8) Good night (1567) Bad night (699)
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  (516): View more from New York

  Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time

  (917): View more from New York City

  An adult?

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  (516): Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time (917): An adult? http://tfl.nu/ka62
  Replies (3) Good night (1495) Bad night (470)
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.

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  (937): I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms. http://tfl.nu/x3mv
  Replies (5) Good night (393) Bad night (867)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.

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  (317): Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position. http://tfl.nu/8zmk
  Replies (1) Good night (353) Bad night (704)
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead

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  (405): Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead http://tfl.nu/0hvl
  Replies (1) Good night (493) Bad night (364)
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  (323): View more from California

  The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"

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  (323): The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role" http://tfl.nu/uhmh
  Replies (1) Good night (700) Bad night (266)

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