HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Randomize
