ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Randomize
