her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
