Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I puked a lego.
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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