in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
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