champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
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