if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
