oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize
