NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Randomize
