we have pet lesbian snakes
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
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