who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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