I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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