He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize