I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
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