sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Randomize
