in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Randomize
