You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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