great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Randomize
