Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Randomize
