i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
