I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Randomize
