Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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