I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
Randomize
