wanna go halves on a baby?
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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