love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
