The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
This can only be settled by a dance off.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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