i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
