good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize
