is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Please, let me fuck your mom
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
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