I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
what is it with giant penises always finding me
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
