ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
