everyone is single if you try hard enough
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Randomize
