He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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