the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
Randomize
