worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Dating After Heartbreak
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
These Images Prove Chrissy Teigen is the Funniest Model Alive
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"