Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
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