I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Randomize
