Christians are straight up FREAKS
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
