Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize
