I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
