i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
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